One of my favorite photos of my mom + I. I have this framed in our dining room. I looked at it often when she was in the hospital.
On February 25th my mom went to the ER not able to breath + feeling like she was being stabbed in the chest. She was finally admitted after 30 minutes of waiting. Immediately the doctors stuck her on 4 different antibiotics hoping that one would be the right ticket. Lots of potential diagnosis were mentioned but in the end it ended up being a very bad case of pneumonia. Mom spent 6 days in the hospital in my hometown before being transferred to OKC. If you know anything about how medical care typically goes it’s a hurry up + wait business (originally they were waiting for a room to open up). She knew that she would be transferred via ambulance but the act itself didn’t happen for a few more hours. The anxiety + waiting game was unbearable.
That same day my dad called to ask if I would get on a plane to come home. I found a flight for the next morning, arranged for subs for my Zumba classes, moved a few meetings, started packing, etc. I received an email about 8:30 that night that my flight was cancelled, most likely because the plane couldn’t arrive in Newark from it’s destination. Most of the country at that time was covered in snow and/or ice. I’m thankful that I knew in advance that my flight was cancelled. Southwest offered to refund or reschedule. When I called I ended up asking for a refund as I felt it was God’s way of telling me to stay put. To be honest after I made that call, I started feeling major guilt. My mom was going to be going into surgery the next morning + I wasn’t moving mountains to get there.
Once my mom was transferred to St. Anthony’s in OKC, things took a turn for the worse. Her blood pressure spiked to 220, then she coded. They rushed her to ICU + began treatment for the absurdly high blood pressure. My dad + I spoke right after they got her settled down, I could hear in his voice that he was scared + shaken. He didn’t tell me at that time that we almost lost my mom.
Thursday March 5th, my mom went in for a successful surgery to remove 1 litre of fluid inside + outside of her lungs as well as another litre of gunk/infection that formed pockets in her left lung. She had an entire 2 litre of soda removed from her left lung. Talk about putting things into prospective! Praise God for the insight from her doctor in Shawnee to know that she had to have this surgery to survive. After surgery she had 2 drainage tubes to continue to collect fluid. The thoracic surgeon expected the tubes to be in for 7-10 days. Meaning the earliest she would get out of the hospital was a week.
When I reflect upon the whirlwind of those few days of getting my hopes up to be with my mom before her surgery, not getting to be there, to the anxiety I felt during her surgery, + the waiting game of actually talking to her on the phone, I ended up catching a pretty bad cold. Thankfully we received snow that ended up canceling an early morning meeting on Thursday, so I was able to lay in bed most of the day, praying for my mom, crying, + sleeping. I imagine I would have still been in bed even if I didn’t have a cold, as I didn’t want to be around anyone anyways knowing my mom was in surgery.
Friday ended up being extremely tough on me. My body was on the upswing but thinking about my mom laying in ICU intubated + no one there when she woke up broke my heart. I kept going back to that time + time again throughout the day. My dad didn’t make it up to the hospital until the afternoon, so I sat in New Jersey not knowing anything until almost 24 hours after her surgery. All I wanted to do more than anything was be there but since I wasn’t able to be I just wanted to hear from someone to tell me she was okay. To possibly hear her mumble or talk or something.
While I was awaiting the phone call from my dad, I decided to see if I could rearrange my schedule again to fly back the following Thursday (the first of my week is heavy with Zumba classes which makes dropping everything nearly impossible). I rescheduled my flight for Wednesday March 11th to stay through Saturday.
It was either Sunday or Monday that my mom had a long talk with her nurse about what she could do to get out of the hospital. She was motivated + ready! By Tuesday her tubes were removed (6 days after surgery!!!!), a PICC line was ordered (which is catheter that is placed in a vein in your arm that goes near your heart that allows blood to be drawn, feeds to be administered as well as IV medications), + she was on her way to getting released.
By the time I arrived at lunchtime on Wednesday, the doctors were setting everything in motion to get her out of there! It was great to be there when each doctor came in to check in + give their updates (she had 4 different docs – the hospitalist, pulmonologist, infectious disease + thoracic surgeon). There were two items that were holding her up. First her blood count was low. She ended up needing 4 units of blood over a 6 day period. The pulmonologist wasn’t too concerned about this since her body had been trying to fight a nasty infection + she just had surgery. His theory was that her body hadn’t been able to reproduce the cells fast enough. The surgeon on the other hand was worried (rightly so) that she may have bleeding somewhere, though her stool samples came back fine. Second item was the surgeon again just not wanting to release her too early. He was the last piece of puzzle to get her out of there. He always sent his nurse to visit my mom in the morning + then he would make his rounds around 7 at night. Thursday morning the surgeon’s nurse removed the staples, reported back to him, + then the waiting game began until 7 when he would come by. 7:30 rolled around without him visiting. My mom started to get restless – all day she told everyone she was leaving that day!
Thankfully my dad owns a pharmacy + is in nicely with many doctors. He received a text that evening from my mom’s primary doctor saying that the surgeon released her from his care. That set in motion her release at 9:45 that night from the hospital. By this time I had driven back to Shawnee with my nephews, to get them ready for bed as they had school the next morning. My parents arrived in Shawnee around 11:00 pm. The first thing my mom said when she made it to her bedroom, “I thought I’d never see this house again.” That was heartbreaking for me to hear. I got her ready for bed, while my dad went to the pharmacy to get her a few prescriptions.
Conner (the grand dog) was probably the happiest to see my mom!
The next two days, before I flew back to NJ, I worked on getting mom to walk around the house + do small tasks (shower, dress, etc.). She would tire out quickly but the only way she would improve was to move!! I left on Saturday afternoon wishing that I was staying longer. I could see how much she needed a caretaker.
I immediately began looking at when I would be able to get back to OK. Almost every year since Anthony + I got married, my mom has come to be with me on or near my birthday (it’s in the middle of April). Since she wouldn’t be able to come this year, I thought it would be perfect for me to go back there. After looking at my schedule, it was going to be harder to be able to stay the length I wanted later in the month. I ended up booking a flight for a 1.5 weeks later. It was a little deja vu as I left on the same flight out of Newark on two Wednesday’s later.
As I mentioned above, the infectious disease doc had a PICC line placed into her left arm (after a failed port near her throat + a failed PICC on the right arm) so that she could receive IV antibiotics for roughly 2 weeks before he reevaluated her to see if a pill antibiotic would be necessary. She had an appointment two weeks later for a follow up but he ended up having to reschedule the appointment for the following week. All in all she was on the IV antibiotic for 3 weeks after leaving the hospital, without having to go on the pill form!!! At her follow up appointment with him, he gave her the all clear, saying that the infection is gone.
Rylan loved to be the little assistant when giving Sassy her antibiotic
She has another follow up with the surgeon this coming week to see how the wounds are healing, and then in a few weeks she will be back to her regular doctor. He let her know at the last appointment that it will be about 6 months before she is back to 100% lung capacity + to her normal functioning levels. She is a true fighter, with help from her incredible friends + my dad, she will make a full recovery in no time at all!
A few tasks that I wanted to accomplish during my second trip to Oklahoma was to grocery shop, clean out the pantry + maybe do a little cleaning. My mom + I went to Sam’s Club + Crest in Midwest City on Thursday. She was cute in the motorized carts, running into end caps or pushing people out of her way! Before we went to the store though, I did a thorough cleaning of her pantry to see what they did + didn’t need, as well as organized it. That was a daunting task!!! After grocery shopping (which worn her out), I started cleaning out toys that the nephews no longer play with from their bedroom + in the den. While I was cleaning, mom started writing her thank you notes for meals brought, flowers + gifts sent. Within the week, she finished them! Not only did I clean up around the house, but we also went on walks, enjoyed the beautiful weather in the backyard, looked through her fabric stash, + just spent quality time together. It was refreshing for me, since it’s been a long time since she has been brutally honest about everything going on pre-pneumonia, about how she got to the point that landed her in the hospital.
I also was able to spend some quality time with the nephews. We played hide + seek at a park, cleaned up the yard for Sassy + Papa, + then I also took the training wheels off their bikes. They both took off with no issues! That was fun to watch.
The boys riding the bikes without training wheels!
I had quite a bit of guilt not getting back to OK while my mom was in surgery. But I ended up being there when she needed me most, when she got out of the hospital one week after surgery! I am finally at peace about it, especially since she is ALIVE!!!!
Thank you to each of you that had been praying for her. I believe foresight from the doctor to get her immediately up to OKC + prayer was what saved her life.
Kim, thank you for chronicling my illness since I’m not much of a writer. You were a huge help when you were here. I think Gods plan was for you to be here the times that you came. It really was the best medicine having you here. I love you sweet pea.